9.23.2010

How good do I have it?

I mean really. Life has had it's sucky moments. My Mom left and I had to watch my family fall apart. My family gets stressed out and sometimes, more than often, we take it out on each other. I get zits on unconventional days. I wake up with puffy eyes from staying up too late thinking about life. My tears flow so much more easily than other peoples'...so I've noticed. Ugh.
I have a bad attitude when things don't go my way. My heart hurts when I am told about the characteristics I possess that are like my Mom's. I get angry way to easily. I battle with being shy on a daily basis. I also battle with why it's so hard to get involved in our new church and feel like I'm apart of it and know people on a deeper level. I want more close girlfriends that I can be myself with. I constantly wish I had a girl best friend again that does things with me and I can call anytime..no matter what. And...I often wish I had a job that I actually enjoyed going to.

But really.

I have a Father in Heaven who loves me and cherishes me like no one ever will in all of my lifetime. He sees my thoughts, hears my cries, and desires to be put above everything else in this world.

He
loves
me
for
who
I
am.

And He's there by my side no matter what.

I am abundantly blessed and highly favored. He loves me for me. He knows how much I want to change in so many areas. And I know...it's not going to happen over night (although I really wish it would).

Not only do I have shoes on my feet, clothes on my back, food in my tummy, and heat when I am cold...
I have a Dad who loves me and does anything he can to take care of me. A brother who I adore and who knows my hurt...and also makes fun of me because that's how he shows his love towards me. Ha!
I have a job that pays the bills.
I have close friends that make me laugh and are like family to me. They were there for me when the storm came, and they never left my side. (these would be Colorado friends...my California friends...that's another story, but still, I am thankful to know them).

What more could I possibly ask for?

I have it real good. And I often get so carried away with the bad things in life that I forget about all the blessings I have.

My hearts desire is to never lose sight of the things I am blessed with. My hearts desire is to become that women of God that I dream about being. My hearts desire is to be carefree again, not worrying about things, and living as if each day were my last.

So...here's to learning to lay everything down at my Lord's feet and not worry...



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