3.15.2011

Perspective

This morning I watched a YouTube video that brought me to tears...
and changed my perspective in many, many ways...


Living in America I get caught up in my day to day life...
my heartache...
my hurt...
my loss...
my, my, my...
And you know what?
I hate it.
I really do.
Life isn't all about what I've been through, or am still going through...
Life isn't all about the pain I feel, the loss I've endured, and the heartache I still seem to be facing.
Upon watching this video, my heart sunk...
it sunk to the bottom of my stomach...
and I realized how selfish I really am.
Yeah, you know what? I have been through some awful life situations...
I've been hurt, betrayed, back-stabbed, lied to...
watched my Mom leave, my family fall apart, my brother become angry at the world,
the person I fell in love with run away with his own selfishness which caused even
more heartache in my life.
The past few years, in no way have been a joy ride...
BUT...
I haven't endured a life changing/traumatic occurrence like a devastating earthquake...
or watched a tsunami flood my town, my country.
I haven't faced hunger, or thirst, or loosing everything I ever owned.
I'm not walking around a town that once was full of people and houses and stores,
and now is nothing...with deceased bodies being pushed to shore.
For some God-awful reason I think that people I know owe me something....
I think that life should revolve around what makes Autumn feel better...
what takes away the pain in Autumn's life.
Blah, blah, blah.
This thought process couldn't be more screwed up!
The beautiful people of Haiti and Japan lost everything...
their homes, their jobs, their families and friends.
Their lives have been absolutely devastated and yet, these two young boys in Haiti,
who survived the devastation in their own home town, cry for the people in Japan...
They know what it's like...to lose everything.
They feel the pain as they watch the tsunami wash away cars and homes...
Why wasn't my heart broken for the people of Japan?
Why wasn't I crying for the loss of so many lives, that may or may not have known Christ?
Why am I still so self absorbed in the pain I feel?
Why can't I take my eyes off myself for a moment and cry out for Japan?
Because...I am selfish.
And I need to desperately change my perspective on life.
My Dad often reminds me, "Autumn, when you think about the hardships you've
been through, always remember, that there are other people going through much
worse situations."
So...here we go....a challenge to myself...
To take my eyes off myself and my pain and my loss and focus on what is going on
around the world, in the lives of other people, the people of Japan and Haiti,
other families who have had to walk through ugly (and worse) divorces, others who have
lost ones they love, whether my death or betrayal and sin.
This is not to say that the pain I feel is magically going to go away,
but if I can focus on other people rather than myself, I know that the pain I feel
will slowly diminish...because I'm not focused on, well, myself.
Sounds so very simple, I know...but to me...this is a huge challenge!
I pray that the video is as challenging and heartbreaking to you (whomever you may be)
as it was to me.
Maybe it'll even challenge you to take your eyes off your pain and loss and think about
what others are going through...others who have lost more,
and have had to deal with greater pain then any one of us in America
could really ever imagine (except those of the 9/11 attacks of course).

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